What If
by ShadowSocks
Summary: COMPLETE. this is a story of an old Emily and Naomi who split in they're younger years, but start talking when Emily misses her bus. the only thing is, they dont know who they are talking to, and we find out life for them is full of 'What If's'
1. Prologue

**this is a peice of fiction based on a british tv program called skins that revolves around 9 sixth form students(16/17 as the series starts, 18 when it finishes) for two years until they leave for UNI. i've always liked skins but i think the 3rd series had been the best, its more deep and the characters are more realistic and intresting. in skins, two of the most interesting people are Emily (whos a twin) and Naomi. in case you where planning to watch this, i wont spoil to much but these two are lezbians, and the story line for them is amazing. so i decided to base this on them and basicly whats happend in the past with this story is that these two spilt up as teens, and they havnt seen eachother for decades, and as old ladies, they meet on a bench as emily has missed her bus. BUT they dont know who they are talking too, which makes it kinda sad =[. well thats all i can say for now, sorry for the really long AN but for those sinful people that have never heard of skins, i just needed to give you a VERY basic summery for their story in Skins. for those who havnt watched it, i strongly recommend you give it a try!! please review and enjoy =)  
**

* * *

The old woman sighed as her bus drove off without her. If only she hadn't spent an extra five minutes talking to her elderly twin sister. If she hadn't, she would probably be on that bus right now.

'What If's' are alternative paths, they are something that could of happened, but 'What If's' also fit very nicely with the saying 'everything happens for a reason.'

'If' Emily Fitch had not talked to her sister, and 'If' she had caught that bus, then she would have never have gotten the chance to talk to the only person she had ever given her heart to just once more.

Of course she wouldn't realise who she would soon be talking to- like everything that happens for a reason, there is always a catch.

So the story I am going to tell is either of fortunate fate or unfortunate fate, it depends on how you see it, either tragic that her love is sitting there and she doesn't even realise it, or happy that even if she doesn't know it, she still talks to her love once more.

The story I am going to tell is not 'What if Emily ignored her sister and actually caught that bus,' no it's ' What if Emily talked to her twin and she missed her bus, and what if she was unknowingly talking to the only love of her life.'


	2. Emily

**sorry the chapters kinda short, i'm on work experience this week, so i'm pretty tired when i get home lol, but i promise you they will get longer =) i had fun writing this chapter, it was intresting making up a tiny bit of past on my own for these two, and i liked describing how determined Emily is. anyway please review and enjoy =)**

* * *

Emily sighed as her bus drove off without her. If only she hadn't spent an extra five minutes talking to her elderly twin sister. If she hadn't, she would probably be on that bus right now.

She stood there with despair, watching the bus until it was no longer in her sight. Like the optimistic person Emily was, she smiled at the fact that she didn't have to wait another hour until the bus came with all her weekly shopping in hand. Instead of doing the weekly shop, she decided to go visit her younger brother first.

Her feet began to ache, as did her back, and she cursed her old age. Turning around and facing the bus shelter, she saw she was not the only one waiting for a bus.

On the bench sat an old woman who looked almost similar in age to Emily. Her hair was white and short, like most old people's. Her face was full of wrinkles like all the other oldies, but the thing that made this woman different from other old women, were her beautiful piercing blue eyes.

Those eyes seemed to be the only prominent feature that retained any trace of youth. Something triggered in Emily's mind, like a déjà-vu, but not so clear that she could remember, so she shook the strange feeling off.

Deciding she was aching too much, Emily shuffled her way over to the metal bench and plonked herself down next to the other woman.

For a moment there was silence. Only distant traffic could be heard. The other woman hadn't even seemed to acknowledge Emily's presence until she asked, "Take it you missed your bus then?" it wasn't really a question but more of a statement, and the sudden speech made Emily jump out of her skin.

"Y-yes, first time in two months too, and every time I do, it always seems to be my sisters fault, she talks too much," Emily laughed. "Did you miss yours too?" she asked.

The other woman wasn't looking at Emily, instead she was looking straight ahead, and for a moment Emily didn't think she was going to reply.

"No," the woman said bluntly. "I just like sitting here and watching things go by- it gives me time to think by myself really. Saying that it's only a habit I've been doing for the last three weeks, you see my husband died recently, and this gives me time to think about where I'll go next and what I'll do." the old woman closed her eyes and sighed softly.

Emily was taken back a bit by the forwardness of this woman, and she really didn't know what to say except, "I'm sorry to hear." this time the woman looked at Emily and half smiled. She breathed in.

"So, where are you off too?" Emily's face lit up. Thank Christ this woman was making conversation because it would make the one hour wait go a lot faster.

"Just to visit my younger brother, see how he's doing. Have you got any siblings?"

"No. Not of which I know of anyway, my mother got about a bit in her younger years, if you know what I mean," she said with a crooked smile. Emily chuckled. "So, what about you? Is your other half still with you?"

Again, what a forward question, but that didn't bother Emily, instead she began to think. "No," she replied. "I never married. I could have but I didn't want to." After that the women sat in silence once more.

Emily could have married many times over, but if she did she wouldn't have been marrying a man. Truth was Emily Fitch confirmed to herself that she was a lesbian in her teenage years, and decided it wasn't just a phase, and would kept her sexuality that way until she snuffed it. Indeed she stuck to her decision, and it led to many short relationships, some of which where good and some of which where bad.

But the reason she never married was because she was hanging on for some one. Naomi Campbell. The person she loved the most out of all those relationships. The relationship went on for five years, right up until the point where they got engaged, and those five years were the best years of her life, even now they still are. But on one unfortunate day when she came home from work, Emily found a folded piece of A4 paper on her pillow. It read four simple words: _I Love You Always. _

And that was it. Her fiancé, had upped and vanished without any explanation what so ever, and it left Emily in manic depression for months, even to this day, she still feels the pain, the hurt and the betrayal, but those last four words meant something to Emily. They meant that even after what Naomi did, she still loved Emily, she'd even said it her self on that note, and if she still loved Emily, that meant that she might comeback one day to marry her, and be with her once more, so Emily decided to wait for her, but she never came back.

60 years Emily waited for Naomi, everyday, just as hopeful as the last, that this day was the day they were going to be reunited at last. The hope she had spat in her face and told her to give up and move on, but she couldn't do that, she wouldn't allow herself to do that, so she hung on waiting. 60 years she waited, knighting all of her relationships that she had from that day on as 'short term'. There was one simple reason for that, and that was that if Naomi ever came back then she would end the current relationship in a flash, so there really was no point getting close to her fling at the time. But of course that never happened.

Emily snapped out of her past thinking and said quietly, "I'm still waiting for you."


	3. Naomi

**next chapter is up =) i liked writing this chapter, quite intresting making up some of naomi's past. this is only going to be a short story and theres probably only going to be one or two more chapters, but i still have plently of ideas for other stories for skins, most of which are naomily of course =D please review and enjoy =D next chapter will be up soon i hope.**

* * *

Naomi couldn't quite hear what the small chubby old woman next to her had just said, but she could tell that it was just the woman thinking her thoughts out loud, so she didn't bother to ask for a repeat.

She silently watched this woman out of the corner of her eye. There was something strangely familiar about her. The way she talked, with a husky voice, and some of her features, like a little beauty mark below her right eye. Her memory was screaming something at her, but her brain wouldn't listen to what it had to say.

Even though she had only known this woman for what- Ten minutes? She felt at ease and strangely comfortable talking to her and just sitting there next to her. She felt like those ten minutes were more like ten years. The last time she had felt like this with another woman was with her first and last girlfriend, Emily Fitch.

Emily fitch. Her fiancé she had run away from because she realised she wasn't ready for it, and she didn't know what she wanted anymore. So she left poor Emily on her own and Naomi ran away from that life leaving everything and everyone she had ever known behind. She had been selfish and stupid.

Of course she still loved Emily, even after she had run away. Hell she even came back a few times, to try and give it another shot. Naomi never went up to Emily, instead she would watch from a distance trying to figure out what to say, but when she couldn't think of anything that might explain all the shit and trouble she caused, she would just simply say "oh fuck it" and her courage would plummet and she would run away once again.

Even after Naomi married and had two children, she still didn't forget about little Emily. Every day she would wonder if Emily was okay, how she was coping and if she had found some one else that made her happy. She wondered this for 60 years, never missing a day.

Two years ago she heard off a friend that two elderly twins in Bristol had been murdered. Instinctively she thought of Emily and her sister (who's name she couldn't recall), but more so Emily. When she asked her friend for the victim's names, she failed to get a suitable answer.

She convinced herself that there were many elderly twins in Bristol, and it was unlikely that it could have been her Emily that was hacked down. Her mind was still at unease and was pushed over the edge when the next day her friend came and told her one of the twin's names.

"I think one of the names was Kathleen." it was then when Naomi's memory sparked.

K. Emily's sister's name began with a K. Oh what was it now? Kathleen? Kathryn? Karen?

Her mind became practically poisoned with pessimism, and she started to believe that Emily's sisters name was indeed Kathleen and that Emily and Kathleen where both dead. Depression hit her very fast and very hard; she cried for days.

Nobody knew why Naomi cried then, not even her husband Tim, or her children, Emily and Jack. She told them all she needed was to be alone for a while, she needed time to think. They didn't ask what she wanted to think about; instead they just did as she asked.

Over those few days, Naomi tried to find out any information out she could about it, but as it turned out the family wanted to keep this matter private, and so it didn't appear on the news or in the paper. This made her cry even more, as she had left her first real love heart broken, and now all those years later, she found out some pathetic person who should be shot decided to murder her sweet Emily.

She began to wonder if this was how Emily felt when she first found out Naomi had left her. The pain of someone you loved with all your heart taken from you, and you weren't there to do anything or try and stop it. But at least Emily had received four very heart wrenching reassuring words as a goodbye, whilst Naomi got nothing. She couldn't even go and say goodbye one last time. Eventually the crying stopped, but the pain was still there, and she knew the guilt and the pain would follow her and linger around until she passed on.

Years after she realised that what she did to Emily was wrong and it was immature and selfish to play with the heart of the person that loved you more than anything, and if she had the choice to go back in time and change what she did, she would do it in a heartbeat, but other times she thought if she had married Emily, she wouldn't have met her husband and she would never have given birth to her two wonderful children.

Everything we decide always comes with a consequence, and everything happens for a reason. She left Emily because years later she would happily marry and settle down with a family- that was the reason fate had decided Naomi was to leave and wouldn't let her go back, but the consequence was Naomi's guilt and Emily's pain for the rest of their lives.

Naomi snapped back to reality. The other woman was staring at her.

"Are you okay? You just blanked out for a few minutes there," the woman said.

Naomi was quick to answer. "Yeah, sorry. Taking a walk down memory lane." The woman smiled.

"I'm not the only one then," she said.

They both gave a small laugh, and it was there and then that it finally clicked in Naomi's mind. Her brain had finally heard her memory yelling, "IT'S EMILY!"

Naomi's eyes locked on to the other woman studying her. The husky voice, the beauty mark below her right eye, her big brown eyes, her lovely smile and laugh, hell even her body language seemed to match perfectly to the Emily that Naomi remembered.

As she studied this woman for longer, more and more things about her Emily came back to her, and most of which matched exactly to this woman. Though a few things like Emily's red hair didn't match to this woman's white hair, but she knew the answer to why that was without even thinking. Old women with bright red hair would just look ridicules and childish. She smiled to herself at the thought of it. Everything apart from the hair and the youth matched. This was indeed her ex fiancé. After 60 years they were reunited. A wave of happiness ran over her. Her little Emily wasn't dead after all and she was so thank full for that, and now amount of words could sum up her gratitude.

Everything happens for a reason. If her husband hadn't died she would never be sat here thinking to herself. The consequence, was her husband had to die for her to be reunited with Emily- after all Naomi couldn't have it both ways, could she now?

Naomi grinned and started laughing; all the while Emily was staring at her like she was mad. She stopped herself and looked at her reunited lover.

"Emily," she breathed. But as soon as that name left her lips, doubt and worry crept back into her mind once more. She knew what question was coming next and she knew exactly how she was going to answer it.


	4. Emily and Naomi

**well this is the last chapter =[ it was only going to be a short story anyhow, but it has been fun writing it =). please enjoy and rivew, thankies =D  
**

* * *

Emily looked confused, as though she didn't quite hear what Naomi had said, but she did.

"That's my name, how do you…?" she trailed off with her sentence, and just stared at Naomi, waiting for answers, and Naomi was quick to give them.

"Sorry," she smiled. "It's my daughters name too, I was just thinking out loud."

_Sorry Emily, _she thought. Up until a few moments ago, Naomi was going to reunite herself with Emily, but a small thought popped into her mind.

_What if Emily had forgotten you? What if she had settled down and now she had a family too? You know that her knowing it was you would only confuse her and bring back painful memories. She doesn't deserve to be messed about by you anymore. If you really love her, then just let her go. SHe's happy- can't you see?_

Emily relaxed and smiled. "I never had children. You see I'm waiting for some one, and children would just prolong my waiting." she scoffed, "I'm waiting for some one who I don't think still loves me, like I still love _her." _she leaned back and rested on the bus station, and closed her eyes.

Naomi simple stared in shock. _So she does remember you and she still loves you. She hasn't got a family, and it's because of you. She's waited for you to come back to her for 60 years! But you never did! You didn't have the courage then! So pluck some up now and tell her who you are! What's the worst that could happen?_

_Naomi sighed, and sat there for a good few minutes thinking about what she should do, juggling between her conscious and her heart. She decided what she would do._

"_Emily," she started. "I-it's-" she stopped and huffed. "Naomi. It's me Emily." she stopped and waited for a reply. Emily still had her eyes closed, but she was slightly smiling, she looked very peaceful._

"_I'm sorry for leaving you all those years ago. It was the worst thing I could have done to you. At the time I didn't think about consequences and how my selfish actions would make you feel, I know I cant change the past, and I know its probably to late now, but Emily, I want you to know-" naomi stopped mid-sentence and looked at Emily._

_She found it strange that she had just revealed who she was, and Emily just sat there smiling. Not saying anything, not moving. Naomi leaned in closer. Not breathing. A lump welled up in her throat, and tears began to trickle down her wrinkled cheeks. Emily had silently passed away smiling, thinking of Naomi, but she missed out on learning that she was about to die next to the love of her life._

_Maybe it was better that way. Not knowing. She died with a smile on her face, and that made Naomi happy, because she knew Emily's last thoughts were of her. More tears now, but they were streaming down her face like a river of regrets. She tried to smile for Emily's sake, but the sad muscles in her face wouldn't let her._

_She now had one last time to say goodbye to Emily properly._

_She kissed Emily's forehead and carried on with the rest of her sentence- never taking her eyes off little Emily, and whispered four simple words, "-I love you always."_


End file.
